we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
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my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone