just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
If You LOL At These 18 Tweets, You’re Probably A Terrible Person
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
If You’re One of These 12 Restaurant Customers, Your Server is Definitely Spitting in Your Food
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
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