The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.