Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay