he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
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Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
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im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.