I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how