I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?