if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .