6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
23 Men Confess What Gifts Would Brighten Their Day
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
25 Of The Most Common Life Mistakes Young People Make
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?