scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes