At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
i now understand why vodka
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle