I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
10+ Incredible Tumblr Stories That Will Leave You Shook
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
16 People Who Have Raised The Bar For Petty Revenge
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder