Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.