Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.