ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.