They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
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You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
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you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes