there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting