I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
These 31 Gross People Really Put The ‘Trash’ In ‘Trashed’
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
21 Bartenders That Are Definitely Winning At Their Jobs
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."