I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club