Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.