Last Night in Virginia (804)

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."

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  I don't even want to know.

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  I love you.

  (1-804): View more from Virginia

  Bad choice

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin

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