She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.