We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
15 Things That Could NEVER Happen Anywhere But the South
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur