he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass