You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right