Texts From Last Night · Last Night in (864)

Last Night in South Carolina (864)

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(864): View more from South Carolina

So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"

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(864): So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life" http://tfl.nu/u5wp

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weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.

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(864): weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps. http://tfl.nu/jawa

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If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.

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Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner

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Previous statement retracted.

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(864): If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay. (828): Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner (864): Previous statement retracted. http://tfl.nu/e7pe

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you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night

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(864): you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night http://tfl.nu/m2bf

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For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.

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(864): For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before. http://tfl.nu/hdcs

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just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside

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(864): just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside http://tfl.nu/pna6

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no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.

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(864): no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job. http://tfl.nu/97jt

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i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room

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(864): i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room http://tfl.nu/jsw5

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so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.

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(864): so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence. http://tfl.nu/nvim

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I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.

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(864): I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you. http://tfl.nu/pv7t

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we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game

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(864): we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game http://tfl.nu/6o4z

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We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.

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(864): We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian. http://tfl.nu/x5ta

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Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??

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(864): Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others?? http://tfl.nu/cnvm

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I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen

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(864): I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen http://tfl.nu/n18y

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Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself

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(864): Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself http://tfl.nu/j8cd

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Last Night in South Carolina (864)

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