so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..