I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night