He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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