I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop coming to work sober
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.