the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.