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Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
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