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i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
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