From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..