Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.