This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
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You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
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Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
32 of the Pettiest, Most Hilarious Reasons People Have Broken Up With Someone