these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Randomize
