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We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
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