Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
i think i just lost a toe
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
i think im in europe. pls send help
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?