Texts From Last Night

Last Night in California (916)

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  (916): View more from California

  Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash

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  (916): Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash http://tfl.nu/rtwe
  Replies (9) Good night (1964) Bad night (384) Order T-Shirt
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  The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.

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  Try oodles of noodles this time.

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  (916): The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang. (1-916): Try oodles of noodles this time. http://tfl.nu/ou73
  Replies (8) Good night (2621) Bad night (344)
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  Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.

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  (916): Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am. http://tfl.nu/a8h9
  Replies (3) Good night (1717) Bad night (377) Order T-Shirt
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  In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?

  (1-916): View more from California

  Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.

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  (916): In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room? (1-916): Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne. http://tfl.nu/vsj8
  Replies (10) Good night (4514) Bad night (427) Order T-Shirt
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  We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench

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  (916): We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench http://tfl.nu/ch9j
  Replies (3) Good night (1609) Bad night (448) Order T-Shirt
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  you want your laptop back?

  (1-916): View more from California

  are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?

  (916): View more from California

  both.

  (1-916): View more from California

  come over.

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  (916): you want your laptop back? (1-916): are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex? (916): both. (1-916): come over. http://tfl.nu/ikpf
  Replies (6) Good night (3043) Bad night (480)
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  I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up

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  (916): I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up http://tfl.nu/ccq8
  Replies (5) Good night (2292) Bad night (607) Order T-Shirt
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  Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.

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  (916): Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is. http://tfl.nu/ux2h
  Replies (17) Good night (2297) Bad night (551) Order T-Shirt
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  whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door

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  (916): whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door http://tfl.nu/x1rj
  Replies (8) Good night (816) Bad night (1744) Order T-Shirt
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  Sadness tears and throw up everywhere

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  (916): Sadness tears and throw up everywhere http://tfl.nu/ierj
  Replies (5) Good night (500) Bad night (1886) Order T-Shirt
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  let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.

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  (916): let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again. http://tfl.nu/i76s
  Replies (4) Good night (1949) Bad night (353) Order T-Shirt
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  Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.

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  (916): Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours. http://tfl.nu/ckbp
  Replies (10) Good night (1546) Bad night (675)
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  Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.

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  (916): Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive. http://tfl.nu/cw9i
  Replies (9) Good night (1747) Bad night (626) Order T-Shirt
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  I can already almost taste penis in my mouth

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  (916): I can already almost taste penis in my mouth http://tfl.nu/o1w6
  Replies (10) Good night (2040) Bad night (769) Order T-Shirt
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  when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.

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  (916): when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas. http://tfl.nu/o5tw
  Replies (13) Good night (771) Bad night (2575) Order T-Shirt