I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.