there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u