Texts From Last Night

Last Night in Connecticut (203)

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  If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over

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  (203): If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over http://tfl.nu/x0ne
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  She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.

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  (203): She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE. http://tfl.nu/wm9f
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  I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.

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  (203): I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed. http://tfl.nu/np6x
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  I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!

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  (203): I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish! http://tfl.nu/uppy
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  it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.

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  (203): it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along. http://tfl.nu/rnt1
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  you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class

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  why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.

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  (203): you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class (1-203): why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday. http://tfl.nu/0z2t
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  im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover

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  (203): im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover http://tfl.nu/eh7g
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  We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese

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  (203): We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese http://tfl.nu/oc3v
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  Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?

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  (203): Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high? http://tfl.nu/olxn
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  Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.

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  (203): Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder. http://tfl.nu/zfbm
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  I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.

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  (203): I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup. http://tfl.nu/cqod
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  he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...

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  (203): he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first... http://tfl.nu/kho5
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  some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.

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  (203): some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed. http://tfl.nu/br4z
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  The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.

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  (203): The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice. http://tfl.nu/qfp9
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  Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing

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  (203): Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing http://tfl.nu/rf46
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