I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
21 Guys Share Their Insane Stripper Stories
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
27 Reasons Why Men Need To Moan More During Sex
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling