Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
The 23 Worst Things That Have Happened After a One Night Stand
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.