scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.