She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.