Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
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I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
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Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".