Texts From Last Night · Last Night in (623)

Last Night in Arizona (623)

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I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.

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(623): I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me. http://tfl.nu/we23

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He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.

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(623): He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out. http://tfl.nu/ixyd

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I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.

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(623): I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard. http://tfl.nu/xo35

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This tent reeks of fear and sangria

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(623): This tent reeks of fear and sangria http://tfl.nu/pbhq

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As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.

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(623): As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know. http://tfl.nu/mc6n

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Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.

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(623): Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight. http://tfl.nu/ky5x

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No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"

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(623): No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough" http://tfl.nu/d4rh

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Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.

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(623): Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes. http://tfl.nu/phpt

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Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.

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(623): Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds. http://tfl.nu/ovdt

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its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..

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(623): its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything.. http://tfl.nu/87ir

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We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight

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(623): We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight http://tfl.nu/am5b

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My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.

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(623): My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here. http://tfl.nu/yssz

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im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.

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(623): im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet. http://tfl.nu/it1a

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Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there

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(623): Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there http://tfl.nu/vurv

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You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"

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(623): You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!" http://tfl.nu/z3ws

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Last Night in Arizona (623)

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