I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
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THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
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Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend