Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.